And I Hate You So
by LilacDreams
Summary: On a lonely night, Draco decides to go for a walk but he meets someone unexpected. In a turn of events, both of them become friends and feelings start to grow. Please Review! Warning: Harry X Draco
1. Thinking of you

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters or worlds written in this fanfiction.

This is my very own first series of fanfiction! So please feel free to submit your reviews or any comments that you wish to tell me. Words in Italics are usually thoughts.

And I Hate You So

His long thin fingers turned the page of the Dark Arts book, his icy blue eyes slowly reading the vertical lines. Slowly, Draco shifted his gaze and watched as Pany and Blaise bickered in a corner about who would look sexier with leather tights. Then, there was Crabbe and Goyle who were busy stuffing themselves with pastry they had bullied the house elves to give them. "Hey Draco! Want some?" Crabbe waved a muffin in the air, his voice muffled as bits of cake flew as he spoke. "No thank you. I have a reputation for my figure to keep up to you know." Rolling his eyes, Draco returned to his book, finding it much more interesting than before. It was 9.45 on a tranquil Saturday night, one of those rare times when he didn't need to attend Quidditch practices, boring History lessons or pleasing blushing girls who would approach him inbetween classes or during meals and etc...and hell, was he bored.

He stretched his slender arms, yawning. Maybe he should turn in early tonight, get a good night's rest, which was rare with his room mates disturbing and waking him for the slightest and most trivial matters. He glanced at the clock ticking away on the wall then at his fellow Slytherins before retiring to his bed.

_' What a dull boring life you have...'_ The word poked out of his head in a familiar voice, it's that familiar deep, husky yet smooth voice... manly voice? No! Irritating, annoying voice! Harry Potter! Fancy him invading my thoughts. As if seeing him during daytime was not enough, now he's haunting me during my private nights alone!

Draco nearly banged his fist on the table. He got up abruptly and stormed to his bedroom, ignoring the loud bickering noises Pansy and Blaise were making. They had somehow managed to drag and mention Draco's name into their conversaion of leather tights.

Lips twitching to one side, Draco sneered, "Come on, Pansy. Nice girls should be back in their own rooms at a time like this. Imagine, what would the Sandman say if he caught you in the boys' room at a time like this, awake?" He widened his deep blue eyes, feigning a horrified expression. _As if the Sandman was related to the conversation at all. But hey, any excuses are good enough. _"You're not scaring me the least bit you know, Draco? And quit the innocent boy act." Pansy huffed as she hesitatedly returned to her own room. "But I _am_ innocent!" Draco called after her, acting hurt.

_' What's the matter? Afraid that the Boogey Man would eat you while you sleep, Malfoy?' _Stop.Don't think of him.

Draco dropped onto the black leather couch. He closed his eyes and slapped himself mentally.

_Yes, sleep...forget about that goody Gryffindor..._

_Harry Potter, the Boy who Lived, his unkempt brown hair... the strong yet smooth arms as he grips his broomstick tightly...his beautiful emerald green eyes burning with such determination..._

_Stop it!!!_

"Argh!!!" Draco clapped his hands over his ears as if to shut out those sinful thoughts of Harry Potter. "Noo!" He shook his head, remaining on the couch to calm himself down. Slowly, he rocked himself gently on the couch, sleep claiming him.

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	2. I Hate You So

"Ouch! You dimwit! Watch where you're going. Can't you see who I am? I could sue you for the injuries!" Draco muttered as he patted the dust off his cashmere jacket and looked up. He sucked in a breath as a pair of green eyes greeted him. The air was cold and clammy, he felt his lungs filled with icy air as he stopped breathing for a slight moment. Can it be...?

_No! No! The nightmare of nightmares!_

He blinked his eyes, staring at Harry blankly.

"Are you going to get up instead of whining all day? You could have watched where you're going." Harry groaned as he pushed Draco off and dusted his own shirt.

"Well excuse me, I wasn't the only one who wasn't watching my way. Look at my hair! It's all messed up now thanks to you. You know, I have shut my mouth for very long about your unkempt and messy hair but that serves no reason for you to go around messing other people's hair." Draco insisted, sounding rather offended.

"Would you just stop complaining? Aren't you supposed to have your daily beauty sleep to maintain your flawless complexion or something?"

"Well, thank you for the compliment on my skin. I guess not everyone has this natural beauty I have. What about you? Sneaking around the corridors and preying on poor helpless Slytherins like me?" Draco eyed Harry suspisciously, as if he was hiding some dung bombs, waiting for a chance to get him.

Harry's eyebrow arched up. "What? Like as if you were ever innocent. It so happens that I don't feel like sleeping and decided to go for a walk. Now if you will excuse me..." Harry retorted and started walking past Draco, their shoulders brushing against the other..

Draco bit his lip for a moment and hesitated. "Hey! I'm coming with you. Just so in case we get caught by Filch, both of us are in for detention instead of just one of us." he said cautiously, his gaze slowly shifting to meet Harry's. "Just to be fair." Draco quickly added.

Mentally cursing himself, he wanted to sink through the ground at this moment. _What was I thinking? Like Harry Potter would ever believe that I just want a normal stroll with him. With him? Normal stroll? Now my mind's going mad._

Harry's face visibly showed surprise and immediately to suspicion. "You're not trying to jinx me, are you?" he insisted. Draco shook his head, and pretended to be sad and hurt.

"Me? Poor lil' me? I wouldn't even jinx a fly!"

Harry bit his lip as his eyes moved from the cold hard floor to Draco's eyes. For a moment, Harry felt his whole body turn to jelly. It was the strangest feeling he ever felt. Under the pale moonlight, Draco's eyes were like a shimmering gem, shining silver and blue whenever he turned.

"Earth to Harry. Hello? What are doing? Zoning out to pay a short visit to your fairy godmother in Dreamland?"

"What? Come on! You wanted a walk so let's get going."

"But I'm cold. Let me go get a thicker jacket."

"Toughen up! Seekers should be tough enough to withstand cold." Harry teased him. "Besides, you'll feel warm enough after a walk in the compounds."

"Well, I happen to fall under a special and unique group of Seekers who need lots of care and maintainence."

"Right. I forgot. Malfoy can't stand such '_common_' things, even a nice chilly walk. Just be quick and get yourself out and ready."

"Give me a minute," Draco said and entered the Slytherin dungeons, heading to his closet for a change of clothes.

"I'll take your word for that!"

Outside, Harry leaned against the cold gray brick walls, waiting. He let his mind wander, and soon, he thought about the feeling he had gotten just by staring into Draco's eyes. _Draco? Now I'm getting all formal with him. Could it be? No way! I'd rather die a thousand deaths! _Shivering, he felt a slight chill down his spine and dismissed all thoughts about Draco.

"I thought you said a minute?" Harry snapped. He stuffed his freezing hands into his pockets as he gritted his teeth against the cold night air. Now _he _starting to get cold after that long wait in the hallway.

"Well, I couldn't help it! I can't be caught dead in some horrible looking or mismatched clothes even if it is at night."

"Alright, you're warm now but I'm not! I said walk! Not sit down by the lake and gaze into it, looking for some huge squid!"

Draco glared at the fuming Gryffindor. As the words slowly registered in his head, Draco's face was suddenly flushed and was as pale as a sheet. "What did you say? G-Giant S-S-quid?" His eyes were opened wide in horror and his mouth, gaping at the lake.

Harry's lips slowly curled into a sly smile after seeing Draco's expression. "Yes, a giant squid which would grab innocent people sitting by the lake whenever he's hungry. Usually at night..." Harry's voice sounding like a narrator for a horror film.

"AHH!!" Draco screamed and hugged Harry's arm tightly, at the same time trying to drag Harry further away from the lake. Harry rolled his eyes but his face pinked subsequently_. What is Malfoy thinking? Doing such an embarrassing act._ Harry hoped the lack of light in the park hid his embarrassing blush.

"Your face is already all flushed! Relax. That was such a girly scream, you know that? Just like the time we were in the Forbidden Forest..." Harry sniggered as they made their way towards Hogwarts.

"It is a genuine Malfoy manly shout when in times of danger. I repeat, shout. I do not scream like a girl you ingrate. You would have been a midnight snack for the squid if it weren't for me!" he excused.

Sitting down at a distance from the lake, they lay on their backs, watching the night sky. Draco looked up at the night sky, bright stars dotted the vast blackness like little diamonds. "The sky's beautiful tonight!" he exhaled.

Harry had to agree as he admired it, taking in the beauty of the stars quietly. Draco pursed his lips together into a thin line and shifted his gaze to his hands. They were slim and graceful (_Like a girl's, Draco thought disdainfully) _and numbed from cold. Stealing a glance at Harry who was still looking into the sky, he wondered what made Harry seem so much like a man every girl wants.

Of course he was taller, bigger size, more muscular, not delicately shaped as himself... 

_I play Quidditch too, even longer than him, shouldn't I be the one with muscles?_

Draco frowned.

_Unfair!_

_Admit it, Harry is a man...and you want him too..._

Draco frowned as he felt his cheeks burning and butterflies in his stomach.

_I am a man too._

_But you're not the type of man Harry is...cool, charming, sexy, nice..._

_I want to puke_, Draco told himself. Unconsciously, he stuck his tongue out.

"What's wrong with you?" Harry poked him in his ribs.

Draco shrieked, smacking his hand away. "Just thought I'd remind you that I'm very delicate."

"No, you're not okay...alone in your room on a Saturday night...all alone...so lonely..."

Harry's words ate at him.

"I am not lonely!"

"I can see it in your face," Harry teased him. "I guess those lonesome nights made you this defensive, unsociable, closed up, whiny, mean..." he sighed exaggeratedly. "We won't blame you, Malfoy, we won't."

"Shut up your mouth, Potter!" Draco seethed, trying his best not to yell. "You're not much better! Alone too!"

"Who says I'm alone, Draco?" Harry asked him. "You think I'm alone...?"

Actually, Harry _was_ alone. After Ron had confessed his feelings to Hermione, they had spent almost every other night in the Gryffindor Common Room together. Though they still cared and their great friendship with Harry was never affected, he still felt awkward, as though he was ruining their quiet time together. He definitely didn't want to play gooseberry! Because of that, he had been lonely at night, always going for walks alone in his invisibility cloak. But tonight was different, he couldn't use his cloak for he met someone unexpected. Someone whom he thought would never be alone and that just gave him the great urge to tease him about it...

Draco kept quiet bitterly. _That's right, who ever said famous Harry Potter was alone?_

_No one._

_He has somebody...somebody to keep him company, somebody to talk and laugh with, somebody to love and to be loved by... _

_I don't have anybody. Yes, there's Pansy, Blaise, Crabbe, Goyle, the other Slytherins... They give me comfort but still, I get this empty feeling I always feel at night. No one...I'm lonely...? I had been lonely for a long time now... but now I'm lonely and I'm in love..._


	3. Love is a double edged blade

**Love is a double-edged blade**

"Aah, Draco! Stop!" Harry gasped but it was too late. Water splashed all over as he landed, rained on by the sprinkling water above him. His dark brown hair was matted to his head as he spluttered like a fish. He could hear a hysterical laughter...

"Draco Malfoy!" he growled. "I will kill you and feed you to the giant squid as an offering!"

Draco laughed at the drenched Harry stood infront of a fountain. Harry sprinted forward and chased after the Slytherin who ran around the fountain to avoid him. "You can't catch me! You're not as swift as me and you have the speed of a tortoise!" he proclaimed before breaking out into a series of laughter.

"Oh yeah? Says who? Besides, I bet you're as slow on your broomstick as on foot!" Harry turned around and chased Draco from the other direction. Too late to realise, Draco ran straight into Harry's arms. "Caught you!"

Harry stared straight at Draco's eyes, now illuminating like a bright turquoise gem. It felt as though the world around him had stopped and time had paused just for that moment when both of them locked their gazes. Again, he felt a slight tingle down his spine and butterflies in his stomach.

His eyes gazed a little lower, fixed on Draco's lips. How could he have not noticed it before? Those pale pink lips, like the freshly bloomed pink roses Aunt Petunia were so proud of. _Harry! What are you thinking?! Are you going crazy! Give yourself a mental slap and wake up!_

Blinking, he watched the now struggling Draco. He kept telling himself that it was just those lonely nights making him a little less sane but as he gazed at Draco again, new fresh thoughts kept flooding his mind. It made him sdisgusted, not at Draco, but himself, for having such sinful and absolutely forbidden thoughts.

Draco screamed, struggling to free himself from Harry. "Let me go! You'll crumple my clothes and squash me to death, you oaf!"

_What was that look? It looked almost...lustful and...longing? Longing and lustful? You're kidding yourself, little saint Potter would never think of anything lustful, ever. _

Harry tightened his hold around the young man. "I won't! I'm taking revenge and you'll be much more quiet if I do squash you!"

A high-pitched shriek pierced the calm of the midnight as they both tumbled down into the fountain, splashing into the water.

He sneezed. Sniffing, he rubbed his nose which was numb from the cold. And he was wet; his body shivered from the chilly air that clung to his wet body. Draco grabbed a twig and threw it at Harry's head; the object accurately bounced off Harry's forehead.

"Ouch! That was painful!" Harry exclaimed, throwing the twig back at Draco. Draco caught it and played with it absent-mindedly, breaking it into half in the process. "You were the one who started it! You accusing twit." Draco huffed.

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"I can't believe I'm right inside the prefects' bathroom, with you. The last person I thought I'd ever be caught dead with, in a _bathroom_. Mind you to watch what you say to your group of goody Gryffindors, Potter." He sneered, grabbing a towel to dry his hair.

"No, it wasn't my fault." Harry denied, unbuttoning his shirt to wipe his chest. He hissed as the cold air contact his bare skin. "I was just being... concerned about your loneliness. It'd make headlines in the Daily Prophet, 'Draco Malfoy, 17, finally shuts his mouth after a long period of loneliness and spending time with brainless cronies.' Now, we wouldn't want Professor Snape to accuse us Gryffindors, would we?"

"Why you insolent Gryffindor! 'Finally'? To think I was gracing you with my royal presence during your dull lonely walks where you'd be probably be plotting more ways to save the day."

"It's not like I want to be a hero all the time!" Harry retorted, sounding hurt.

_Looks like I hit his sensitive side. Harry Potter not wanting to be a hero? Ridiculous, that boy attracts attention as much as honey attracts bees._

Harry took the silence as speechlessness, a grim smile appearing on his face as he put his clothes back on. Draco then finished drying himself and also put his shirt on, setting it straight before he buttoned up. Harry, on the other hand, suffered with the cold, watching Draco's movements carefully. He eyed the way Draco's nimble fingers did the buttons, eyes slowly trailing to his neck, the delicate jaw line, the pout of his lips, the tinge of pink on his cheeks, the bright glaze in his beautiful ice blue eyes...

Feeling the intense glare, Draco slowly gazed into Harry's eyes, shocked at the expression Harry was showing. _What's this...?_ Then, he felt a sudden urge, a sudden need to be close to Harry. He wanted not just to be friends with Harry, but something more.

_No! You can't! It's just... not right!_

He fought his mind and at the same time, the urge to just reach out and grab him. Soon, he was lost in the emerald green eyes, gazing into them longingly. In his stupor, Draco moved close to Harry, kneeling right next to him. Harry cast his eyes up questioningly at Draco. "Wha...!" Draco had cut his words off with his lips. Grabbing Harry's shoulders, he clutched him close as he deepened the kiss with his tongue.

Harry uttered a muffled gasp, squirming at the intimate contact, his eyes wide in shock. But as a few moments pass, his eyes fluttered close and he melted in Draco's embrace. He tasted a hint of honey in his mouth... Too soon, Draco broke the kiss, pulling away as he stared into the green orbs of Harry's eyes.

"You're mad. This must be some bet with your Slytherins right? See if Harry Potter will succumb to the 'great' Draco Malfoy and make him look like a fool," he told Draco.

"No... that's not..." Draco immediately defended himself, still shaken by his earlier foolish act. _I should be locked up! Draco, you fool..._

"That's it right? You're just playing a prank on me! Well, let me tell you something. This joke has gone too far! I'm disgusted at you and your cronies, preying on me like that. You must have known that I've been going out for walks alone at night and have been plotting this all along." He paused for a moment, catching his breath. His face had turned red and his eyes like flaming green fire, burning in anger..

"I should have known, too good to be true that Draco Malfoy is actually willing to take a walk with Harry Potter! Just thought I'd you know that even though I do not have the company I used to have from my two bes friends, it doesn't mean that I'll actually stoop so low as to be your friend! " Harry quickly spun around and ran out of the prefects' room.

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Author's notes:

Hope you liked this chapter! I have been asked why Draco is so wimpy in this fanfiction by my friend and by others too and would like tot ake this chance to explain. You see, in this other universe (Harry and Draco), I see Draco being the 'girly' one. He paying more attention to his looks and reputation. This is because if I were to put a mean bean Draco (which I like too!), it would be awkward for me, for I have no idea how to write a Harry x Draco fanfiction with a mean Draco. Thanks, and remember to review!


	4. Bitter Beginnings

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters or the places stated in this fiction!

Author's Notes: Yay! I've finally updated with much naggings from my friend, Junella! Anyone missed me? Grins -silence in room- alriight. Well in this chapter, it has already been a few days since the 'kissing' incident. Thanks for all the reviews I've received so far! Trying my best to make this a much nicer fiction to read! (Though exams have already killed my brain cells and I've been having writer's block for like 3 months.)

**Big** Notes: This is just my first draft and I plan to edit this chapter in due time! This is just to satisfy the curiosity of certain readers. I feel that I have spent too long trying to put this chapter up so I thought I'd just let my most earnest readers get the first glimpse of it before I do further editing. (I am one fickle person.)

Little Notes: Words in italics are Draco's thoughts and things he might be thinking about as others speak.

**Chapter 4: Bitter Beginnings**

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Draco's POV

Time: 1am.

Location: Slytherin Bedroom

Curses to date: 1million

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The moonlight shone through the parting in the curtains, illuminating a figure on the velvet green bed. It was silent. Everything seemed still but his once-in-a-while blinking eyes.

_One…two…three…four…_

Around him lay withered red petals of flowers, all scattered over the bed, floor, tables…

_He hates me…he hates me not…he hates me…_

A small frown touched his lips as he clutched the crumpled sheets to his chest. A gust of wind entered, blowing the lonely petals into a whirling breeze. His eyes fluttered for a moment and his thin lips twitched, mumbling softly to himself, _"Bloody Gryffindor..." _and then sleep took over him...

The sunlight came in rays through the parting of the thick curtains. Grunting, Draco slowly dragged himself out of his bed and got dressed. The moment he entered the Common Room, he saw his usual gang waiting for him. Immediately, Crabbe and Goyle stood up. They stood beside him and gave light punches on Draco's shoulder. Grunting, Draco sneered, "Watch the creases." And he gave a swift flick on the area they had touched him. Retreating slowly, Crabbe and Goyle followed behind Draco silently into the hallway.

The moment he took a step out of the Common Room, he heard loud thundering footsteps behind him. Before he realized it, he felt a tight grip on his right arm. '_Am I not spared from this daily routine?' _Draco groaned inwardly. Slowly tilting his head, he saw a grinning Pansy. His so-called 'girlfriend' since his incident with that feathered crazed chicken (Buckbeak) in his third year. As though a sudden revelation hit him, he stared at Pansy in wonder, blinking like an idiot.

'_How could I ever be attracted to a girl like Pansy? Sure she's easy to satisfy. But she has not an ounce of feminism in her very body. No grace, not a hint of common sense…' _Draco shivered as he let his mind list down all the bad points.

_So unlike someone I know. Someone with the most brilliant emerald green eyes I've ever seen. One look into his soulful eyes could drown anyone. His beautifully carved lips, red as the freshest roses… Harry Potter…_

"Draco? Why are you staring at me so with that lopsided grin of yours?" It was as though he was being brutally dragged back to the real world, his dreams fading and shattering faster than anyone could say 'Quidditch'.

'Ah, Pansy's shrill voice. The savior of my sanity.' Draco thought silently and shook his head. "Nothing much. I was just admiring how beautiful you look this morning, Pansy."

Flashing her his ever so charming smile, he walked down the hallway hurriedly, feeling guilty for being such a liar._ Liar. _This word struck him immediately. It was what Harry had called him on that very night. _Liar, liar! It was just a prank wasn't it?_ These words echoed at the back of his mind, eating him up slowly. He was feeling horrible. Even more so when he realized Harry was avoiding him at all costs. _Harry._ Slowly, he closed his eyes, forming delicate half-moon lines, accentuating his sharp features.

_BANG! _Someone had knocked into him. The two figures tumbled above each other, forming an awkward form. Somewhat like a tough game of Twister. "Idiot! Why don't you watch your bloody steps? You insolent fool!" Draco growled menacingly, roughly pushing away the body on top of him.

"What?! You watch your steps! It's a damned turn for God's sake!" At once, both bodies stiffened like ice. Faster than lightning, both figures pushed each other roughly, struggling to get up. _Harry Potter, speak of the devil. _There was a bitter smile on Draco's porcelain face.

"Watch your tongue, Potter." Pansy hissed like a wildcat at Harry.

"Back off, Parkinson." Hermione retorted, taking a step forward.

"Why if it isn't Little Miss Know-it-all. Read the advertisement in the Daily Prophet recently? They have a special offer for people in need of shrinking their huge Beaver teeth." Pansy laughed. Snorted, more like it. Hermione's face turned beet red and as she opened her mouth again to reply, Ron intervened.

"Well, at least she has brains. Unlike some Slytherins here, I truly wonder if they do read the Daily Prophet at all, much less their textbooks." Ron sneered, his intense gaze fixed on Pansy, before shifting to the boy on the floor. "What's wrong Malfoy? Cat got your tongue?"

_A queasy feeling in his stomach as everyone turned their eyes on him, waiting for his next move. He examined the scene in front of him, assessing every bit of their body language. Crabbe and Goyle, clenching their fists, unable to construct sentences good enough to fire back at the Gryffindors. Pansy, her hand tugging at his robe, eyes pleading for him to avenge her. The Golden couple, Weasley and Granger, standing side by side, glaring at him. _

_And then… there's Potter. His eyes looking straight into his, piercing right through his soul, it was though he was searching for all the little secrets hidden within him_. "Let's go." Draco mumbled, turning around sharply, leaving behind a dumb-founded Weasley.

_Right there, right at that moment , he felt his heart breaking into little pieces. Harry's cold stare had weakened his whole body, and if not for his robes, everyone would have noticed that his knees were trembling. His heart felt like it was constricted by many strings like a puppet, and Harry was the puppeteer. One look at him and it was as though his fingers had tugged at the strings, squeezing his heart painfully. Why? What is this power, this charm that he has worked over him? Why of all people, Saint Harry? Why had he noticed only now? What now? Snap out of it! It should be NEVER! Never…ever…_

It was just the start of his bitter beginnings…

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A/N: How was it? Review!

GoddesMoonLady: Thanks for the review! Okay, I'll keep a note on that Not very used to the time transition yet but shall try!

PrOnGs Da GrEaT: Hehe, thanks! Not everyone likes slash pairing such as this /

Hpfansunite: Shall take note of Draco! Thanks and don't worry, he won't get so wimpy until he becomes a pushover. Just a little feminine, that's all. Heh.


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